Monday, June 30, 2014

I Love Aging

Before I get started, you should know that I am walking contradiction. Remember how I told y'all I was scared to get older? I briefly mentioned it on my 27th birthday but I have definitely written about it other times too. EEK. I used to have a big issue with aging.

However (here comes the contradiction)... I have recently decided that I LOVE AGING
Why, you may ask? Truth be told, I have never felt better in my life. I have never felt more loved, attractive, successful, or knowledgeable than I do in this very moment. Therefore, I have been feeling like a little sass kitten with thoughts of, "I've still got it."

Contrary to my college days and all the partying that I did, I now get excited about the yard being freshly mowed, zero dishes in the sink, and all of the laundry put away. Spoiler alert: all of those things got completed this weekend in the Skinner household. I am pleased as punch. Since we're hosting a 4th of July party this Friday and all, I wanted to make sure that the house was spic & span. For all my fellow red, white, and blue lovers, you have to check out Kohls. They have the best sales right now on 4th of July stuff (here). Plus, don't forget to use your 15% off coupon

Anyways, in the spirit of the best holiday evs, here are a few pins that I may or may not be making for Friday!

Friday, June 27, 2014

FOR SALE + Five on Friday

Although the link-up is temporarily on a break (say day), I decided to still post "Five on Friday." Enjoy!

1. FOR SALE.
I'm sad to say that my large booty does not fit into the size small maxi dresses that I recently purchased. I am very much apple-shaped and wear a small in every dress that I own - except these two! They seem to run a little smaller. I am selling them for anyone interested. Whoever comments first will get dibs. I will accept payment via PayPal (I'll send you my email address once I get the comment).
Dress 1 original site: HERE
Dress 2 original site: HERE
2. FAMOUS.
I feel famous right about now. That's due primarily to the fact that I finally created my blog Facebook page. Do me a favor and please go "like" the page! I am going to be integrating this more and more. I may even be doing a giveaway very soon... most especially for my Facebook fans!
3. BREAK
I have been feeling a little overwhelmed for no good reason lately, so I am taking the day off to get "caught up" and relax a little! Therefore, hello pretty weekend. I sorta love you. Oh and to top things off, hubbs and I are going out country dancing with my co-worker and her fiance! Yippie.
4. RECIPE
When I saw this recipe on Pinterest, I about died. As y'all know, I have a ridiculous obsession with anything s'more related. These looks unique, tasty, and very smore-like. Get in my belly!
5. UGLY?
I believe in one piece bathing suits... but my husband would beg to differ. He does't understand them at all. I just feel more comfortable in them. Anyways, I purchased this white one a while back (for like $20 on Groopdealz) and I plan to wear it to the waterpark this weekend. So my question is: is the suit ugly? Or too "old-person-looking" for me?

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Things That Make Me Weird

I do weird things every once in a while. But I like to argue that it's the very reason why my husband loves me. I am unique and special, to say the least. Here are just a few examples:

* I am an open book, and sometimes I say things without a filter. Whoops. 

* I am constantly freezing - even when it's very unreasonable to be cold (such as in summer). 
* My love for July 4th outweighs my love for any other holiday.

* I bought a stress toy for work and named him Kishy, with the help of my co-worker. She owns a stressball that is very similar, which is named Kitty. And I asked what I should name mine. She suggested "Fishy" since it's a fish and all. But I found it hard to say "Kitty" and "Fishy" quickly back-to-back, so we settled on Kishy.
* I believe that last month I was "spiritually pregnant." Sorta laughable, sorta weird of me. I am just going with it. I just honestly believe that God has great plans for me and motherhood.

* I have inside jokes with myself. I kid you not.

* I hate ranch dressing, unlike every other American in this world.

* My sense of humor is a little strange.
* I believe that "on time" actually means "arrive 15 minutes early". It's an annoying and weird habit of mine.

* My most favorite thing ever is napping. And being lazy in general.

* I'm a neat freak, even though our house is currently a disaster.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Happiness Equals

Fact: sometimes I really like other people's blog posts to the point that I feel that it's only necessary to copy them, obviously giving credit. That's exactly what is happening right about meow. Thank yew Kayla! Ready, set, let's roll. By the way, did anyone else just think of Chase Rice too? Or is it just me? *Singing*

HAPPINESS = MAXIS
Maxi's have become a serious problem of mine. I think it's mostly because they are the world's comfiest piece of clothing that ever existed. I may or may not have just recently gotten a few more goodies delivered to my mailbox. Oh and P.S. I am absolutely going to be buying this one very soon from Blue Avenue. I already asked the owner to save me a small :-) If you haven't shopped at Blue Avenue yet, you are crazy and a half shell.
1 / 2
HAPPINESS = SUNSHINE
Two weeks ago, hubby and I broke down and bought season passes to the local water park. It was pretty much the best decision ever. We decided that we're going to take off work one day and just soak up the sunshine. Nothin' better.

HAPPINESS = SNAPPED
I'm not even embarrassed to admit it: I am truly addicted to Snapped, the TV show. It comes on the Oxygen channel and I just have a flippin Hay Day on Sundays, which is when there are marathons all day. Too bad grad school gets in the way. I am currently shaking my fist at the computer screen.

HAPPINESS = LESS STRESS
After much thought, I decided to drop one of my graduate classes this summer. That means I will be fairly busy in the fall semester. However yay for less stress this summer. Dropping the class was a necessary move to maintain my 4.00 GPA.

HAPPINESS = AMERICA
I kid you not, our guest bedroom is full of red, white, and blue things in preparation for our upcoming July 4th party. I am more excited than Mama June.
HAPPINESS = MOVING FORWARD
I am excited to announce that today is the first day of our IVF process. I am starting birth control today, and will be on that for 3 weeks. After that, we will really get the ball rolling. If you feel so inclined, you can read more about the IVF process here.

HAPPINESS = FLOWERS
Like these pretty blue ones that I got yesterday from my MIL.

Monday, June 23, 2014

Pain

On Saturday evening, I told my hubby, "let's watch church live from home tomorrow, okay?" Our church streams the service live online, and we can project it to our TV. I had quite a busy weekend with hosting a baby shower, babysitting, and attending a wedding, which meant it was necessary for me to sleep in late on Sunday. So that's what I did.

After eating breakfast on Sunday morning, our neighbor invited Ross to go play golf. I decided that I would still watch church online while he was gone, and he could re-watch it later. Right before the service started (and after my hubby had already left for golf), I went to the ladies room and got an unexpected, sad surprise. Immediately the tears started flowing. On and on.

I stopped with the self-pity but couldn't stop crying. I honestly don't think I had any control over it. I decided to lay in bed and attempt to watch the church service. That didn't work out very well. The only thing I heard during the hour & half service was, "if it's important to us, it's important to God." Also, one of the worship songs was in regard to healing a broken heart. So I prayed. And prayed. And prayed. I prayed for God to heal my broken heart and to help Ross and I conceive a child.

Finally, the tears stopped for the time being. However, I know that the tears will come and go. I'm sure this isn't the end of my crying fit just yet. I can't help but feel like I "lost a baby." I was totally convinced that I was pregnant this month. I protected my body like I've never done before - being careful with what I eat, taking it easy on the caffeine, and zero alcohol intake. I wanted to protect the tiny human that wasn't even inside me.

I don't for a split second blame God. His plan is far better than my own. But it's a hard pill to swallow none the less. I'm embarrassed. Upset. Sad. Angry. Hurt. Confused. Shocked. Truth be told, I would never wish this pain on anyone... not even people that I don't exactly care for.

More than anything, I am confused. Why God, why??? I honestly thought I learned my lesson. When we first started trying to conceive in November 2012, I wasn't 100% "right" with God. Neither was Ross. Now we both have such a deep relationship with God - together and even individually. We both trust in God fully. But I can't help but doubt myself sometimes. Am I doing something wrong? Is there a sin that I keep committing and need to repent? And I'm being punished? Or maybe there's still a lesson to be learned. 

It's hard... because on Saturday when I was babysitting my "niece", everything felt so natural. I am supposed to be a mom. After I rocked her to sleep for an afternoon nap (she's 9 months old), my husband explained that he liked seeing me take such good care of her. There wasn't a greater feeling than knowing my husband even recognizes my motherly instincts. I am supposed to be a mom.

Now what?

Besides the embarrassment of having to tell everyone that it didn't work, I will have some other personal battles to get over. I have no other choice but to swallow this pill and trust in God's greater, more amazing plan.

I plan to call the doctor this morning and let them know that we would like to pursue IVF. From what they've told me in the past, I will have to take birth control for 1 month, and then they can begin the process. Hopefully I will know everything soon and update y'all then. Your prayers over the past month are so appreciated. I know God can still hear - but apparently it's just not the right time........... YET.
P.S. No blog post is a "good post" without a picture. Here's one of baby Allison.

Thursday, June 19, 2014

I Can't Tell You

I can't tell you... exactly how much I love America. But it's a lot. Hurry up, July 4th!
I can't tell you... how much I love a good country song. Also, country dancing is the ultimate pleasure of mine. 

I can't tell you... how anxious and excited I am to find out if I'm preggo or not. This is one test that I want to pass so badly that it hurts. I keep praying!

I can't tell you... how many glasses of wine I will drink if I get a negative on that important test. I haven't had a sip of alcohol since I started Clomid almost a month ago. I am honestly not a huge drinker, but that is something that I absolutely plan to do if it's a BFN.

I can't tell you... how busy and difficult my two grad courses are this summer. Sad. But, a big fat hello to the end being in sight. #iseeya

I can't tell you... how excited that I am to babysit this princess on Saturday. Have I mentioned before that her and I are best friends forever. No lie.
I can't tell you... how odd it feels to know that hubster & I have been married almost three years. It's already time to look into photographers for our upcoming annual anniversary shoot. (See year one here, and year two here). Pure excitement ensues. 

I can't tell you... just how clean my house is right now. Since I am helping to host a baby shower at my casa on Friday, it's pretty much spick & span.

I can't tell you... how much I enjoy self-tanning. I don't like the idea of fake baking in an actual tanning bed, but applying a tanning bronzer to the skin just gives me that much more sass. 

I can't tell you... exactly why I have an hour & half attention span when it comes to movies. I always zonk out after my time has expired. We attempted to watch "Her" last Friday, but momma bear (what I call myself), decided to hit the hay before finishing it. 
I can't tell you... how much I enjoy the smell of leather. I even buy leather-scented candles. Is that weird?

I can't tell you... enough: I eat Mexican food every day. It never fails. 

Monday, June 16, 2014

Bathroom makeover + A Rant

It's unfortunate that I don't feel any different yet. Maybe I'm preggo. Maybe I'm not. I know it's still "early" by all accounts, but I keep praying to God for morning sickness and no period. 

On Friday June 13th, I had my progesterone levels tested with the hospital lab. The results came back with the level of 41, which is great. Anything above a level 3 means that I definitely ovulated. In the past, my levels ranged around 18-20, so 41 is awesome. This is due in part to the injectables that I had though - so I can't get too too excited. This number also means that if it continually rises, my body can easily sustain a pregnancy. 

I thought for sure I would get to take a pregnancy test this week, but the nurse told me that I would have to wait 10 days from my progesterone lab (which was Friday) before I could do a pregnancy test. Well shoot a monkey.

Sooooo... Monday June 23rd should be when I can test (if I haven't started my period). I am also unable to do an at-home pregnancy test because the injectables that I had contained hCG. In at-home pregnancy tests, hCG is what is detected to give a positive sign. Therefore, I could test and potentially get a false positive.

Preliminary talks with my hubby made us decide that we may end up pursuing IVF if this does't work. Which also means that we are going to take on a lot of debt since there is no way that we randomly have 10k sitting anywhere. 
<Begin Rant>
Can I also say that it annoys the absolute heeby jeebies out of me when people complain about pregnancy and how they are feeling? I swear, I am going to flip a switch if I hear one more person say, "ugh, I am just so tired of being pregnant!" God knows that I have prayed for a healthy baby (or babies), at all costs during my pregnancy. Trust me, God knows my heart and desires. That being said, I am fine being on bed rest for months on end. I am fine throwing up every single morning. I am fine with that. I just cannot handle one more complaint.
<End Rant>

I swear I am a happy camper, and as such, I am going to switch subjects now.

Let's talk about America, shall we?
Obsession is a complete understatement. How did I not find this cute bathroom decor sooner? Thanks to my dear friend, Kohl's Department Store, when I laid my eyes on this baby, in my cart she went. No other thought went into it. Um, p.s. my frugal self was pleased to see that it was on major clearance. 

Anyways, I promise to post some more picture of our bathroom very soon! I am finishing a couple of touches and then I'll share!

Friday, June 13, 2014

Thing That Make Me Laugh 2.0

A little while back, I posted "things that make me laugh." Well, it turns out that I find humor in a lot of things. Because I found some more that I needed to share. Enter things that make me laugh, version 2.0.

This dog is doing it right.
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No one told his poor man about the alien invasion.
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A little patriotic. I can relate. 
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Ain't that the truth.
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I love fried chicken.
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I can relate.
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Happens every time.
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Sadly, I probably look like this when I dance.
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Never forget.
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I felt SO cool.
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This is how I envision Layla and Zoey throughout the day.
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I hope I don't ever do this on accident.

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Beauty Favorites: Setting Sprays

The purpose of makeup setting spray is to do just that: set your makeup. It's basically like hairspray for the face. In fact, in the past I have used hairspray on my face... but that's a different story for a different time.
Urban Decay De Slick - $14 & 1 oz.
Pros: spray intensity is perfect; helps makeup to last a little longer than usual
Cons: too much money for so little product

Victoria's Secret Make It Last (in stores) - $14 & 4.05 oz.
Pros: product will last for a long time; keeps making lasting for hours on end
Cons: sprays a little harshly

Overall, I much prefer the Victoria's Secret one. Although I don't like the spray intensity of it as much as the UD one, I feel like it holds much better. Plus, you get way more product for the price. Me likely. Other noteworthy setting sprays include:
Today I am linking up with my girl Jordon!

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Wedding Wednesday: What NOT To Wear

I actually really love going to weddings. The main reason that I like them is because the whole day revolves around L-O-V-E... Love! Best believe that my sappy self loves love. Okay I think I've used the word "love" too much. But it's a pretty great thing, and I pray that all my blogger friends & readers will find their most perfect companion! 

All that being said, trying to find a good outfit for a wedding is important! You want to feel all dolled-up and pretty, but you don't want to go overboard either. I have compiled a list of what NOT to wear to weddings. Take note, ladies! Also, if you can think of additional 'what not to wear' items, leave me a comment below!

Little White Dress
This is a big no-no! Seriously.

Frumpy Dress
Just no.

Super Revealing Dress
Opposite of a frumpy dress, don't go overboard and show too much skin!

Overalls/Overall Dress
I understand this is a style that's coming back, but it still makes you look like a little kid unless worn correctly.

Graphic Dress
No one wants to read your dress. They want to look at the bride!
Today I am linking up with Jordon & Meredith!