Tuesday, September 15, 2015

A Good Window-Shopping-Sesh

We've always used plastic sacks from stores (ex: HEB, Target, TJ Maxx, etc) for our bathroom trash bags. I used to think that was trashy to do (that pun tho), but later decided that reusing a bag is perfectly acceptable and not trashy at all. Anyways. The other day, hubby said, "We are running out of trash bags! You've stopped shopping!" He was applaud in a joking way.

Whenever I accepted my part-time job in order to stay home with The Kenz during the day, I knew we had to cut back big time. No more shopping for mommy. But when I do shop on the rare, sweet deals only. No thankie to full priced items.

Although I am not shopping anymore, I still love me a good window-shopping-sesh online. Online shopping for the win. Espesh with my Amazon account. That's neither here nor there. Here are a few things that I feel like I need in my life. Give me all mommy things, please. And some white sneakers, if you will.

Anyways, thanks for all of your support in yesterday's post! I received a few private emails, texts, and Facebook messages with people saying things like, "that's happened to me" and "yep, some friends are only in your life for a season!" I also had people who I know IRL (who also know those two ladies from the previous post) tell me that this is the right move. So it was good to hear that I'm not alone in those feelings and to get a little reassurance. That's one things that I really like about blogging - getting it all out there. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I have always been brutally honest with my writing.

Anyways, onward we go with people who love and support me... ESPECIALLY in times of pain and joy. "As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend." Proverbs 27:17

Monday, September 14, 2015

Why I'm So Hurt

I'm not mad. I'm not angry. I'm not frustrated. I am simply hurt.

I thought about it a lot. For 3 months now, to be exact. I have spent so many days in tears over it and the truth is, I need to let this hurt go. This is my way of letting it go. Everyone is entitled to handle the situation differently and this is how I'm choosing to handle it.

It's just not an easy pill to swallow when two people that you cared about very much (best friends, if you will) make no attempts to 1) meet our first born - especially considering our struggle to conceive, or 2) even ask about our first born and how they're doing.

Keep reading.

Since not everyone knows the dynamic of my previous friendships with these ladies, some people may not understand why I'm so deeply hurt. But there are a few things I want to point out. 

1) We had the type of friendships where you don't need invitations. They know they are always welcome to visit, call, or text. And I knew I could do the same for them. If I showed up just to see them for no reason, they would not have complained. I would assume that most best friends are like that. 
2) Both ladies have one child each - a daughter.
3) Neither lady struggled to conceive their daughter.
4) I had been best friends with these ladies for about 10 years and they were both in my wedding.

Quite honestly, this hurt was all spurred by Facebook. You know how FB reminds you of the various things that happened, "On This Day"? Well. I kept getting reminders over and over about these two friends in particular. I apparently posted over and over again about how excited I was about their daughters being born, and how excited I was to visit them. I decided to take print screens of a few posts that I had made. You can see by the dates that I was there to visit their daughters within 8 days for both of them. Obviously I blurred out names and pictures somewhat because this post isn't about name dropping. If you wanna read some name drops, read this post!

First person

Second person
It's ironic to me that all of our daughters were born on the 5th of the month and I was there to visit their daughters (because I couldn't contain my excitement) by the 13th of the month. For both of them. It's severely hurtful that my daughter didn't get the same treatment, or even close to it. And I can't possibly expect others to love my daughter as much as I do. But I would expect my two best friends to have some type of desire to meet my MIRACLE child within a week... or month... or 3 months especially considering our 2 year struggle to get pregnant. But none of that happened. 

Thankfully, an awesome pal of mine gave me a lot of encouragement today. She said that it's very possible that God only put those two ladies in my life for a season. And thinking about it now... that makes sense. Maybe I was supposed to have some type of impact on their life for a short period, or vise versa. I shared special memories with those two ladies and wish them the best. But considering how hurt I am, the damage has unfortunately been done and now I have to move onward with the people in my life who care about me and my blessings, just as much as I care about theirs.

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19

"Do not be deceived: Evil company corrupts good habits." 1 Corinthians 15:33

Saturday, September 5, 2015

Kensington Grace: Three Months

Weight: At her 2 month appointment, she was 12lbs 4oz., so there's no telling at this point. But I know she is gaining continually! My girl is a chunker and I love every minute of it.

Height: At her 2 month appointment, she was 22.6inches and I know she's growing like a weed. We'll get her stats next month at her 4 month appointment. 

Hair: Still brown. She has a bald spot on the back of her head where she rubs it against the sheets. But the rest is growing steadily. 

Eyes: Greenish/Hazelish still. Just like daddy.

Clothes: Size 3 month, and some size 3-6 month clothing as well. 

Diapers: Size 1 until we run out of them, and then we're switching to size 2! We just hate to waste extra diapers.

Sleeping: She goes to bed around 9pm and generally sleeps until 4 or 5am. However, we've had a few nights where she sleeps the entire night! As we like to say in our house, "YAYYYYY KENSIEEEEEE."

Eating: Still cluster feeds on occasion. Silly girl. But most bottles that she takes are 6oz. 

Kensie's favorite things: Bathtime, laying on mommy and daddy's bed, sitting up, talking, and starring at her doggy sisters. She is totally in awe of them. 

Mommy's favorite things: Being Kensie's mommy, showing Kensie off to our family and friends, and having girl talk with her. We talk about everything under the sun.

Daddy's favorite things: Showing Kensie off. Anytime we go somewhere public, he always wants to hold her or push the stroller. He also loves that she has his nose shape - their noses are identical! His way of showing Kensie affection is by putting her entire nose in his mouth. After all, daddy says, "that's my nose."

Mommy's nicknames for Kensie: Sister, Sister bear, Honeybee, Kensie Girl, Doodlebug, Jitterbug.

Daddy's nicknames for Kensie: Princess.

New with Kensie: Kensie girl loves saying, "Oooohhhh." It is so cute. She is ALWAYS talking. She also sits up really well! We're still working on tummy time even though she hates it. Her poor head is HUGE so I imagine it's pretty heavy to lift. 

Prayer: Jesus, we are so grateful that you put Kensie Girl in our lives. I pray that you will continually watch over my baby girl's health, my husband's health, and my own. Please also keep us safe and protect us in all areas of life! We pray that you'll help Kensington grow and learn something new each day. Give us the wisdom to raise a happy, healthy, and God-fearing little lady! Thank you for your blessings! In Jesus' name... AMEN!

Friday, September 4, 2015

I'm The Type Of Girl

I mean... if you wanted an honest post, you came to the right place. I won't bite my tongue any longer and if the shoe fits, then by golly, you ought to put that shoe on and werk it, sista.

I'm the type of girl who steps up.

You better believe that if you've had a baby and we're close friends (I'm talkin' BFF status), I will be there to visit within a week. You mark my words. In fact, I have a pretty good track record to prove it. Heck, even if we're not super duper close, but we still keep in contact, I will be there within a month or two at maximum (just to give you some space; after all, if we're not BFF's, I don't want to overstep but I still want you to know that I care). Either way, a child=biggest miracle ever. I definitely want to be partaking in that excitement!

But that's just me.

Oh by the way, my daughter will be three months old tomorrow.

Moving on...

And you know what else? You better believe that if you're getting married and you invite me to a shower or party to celebrate, I will be there. No questions asked, because holy cow what an exciting time! You found the one who makes your soul happy. Count me in!

But that's just me.

I can't tell you how many times I've driven across the state of Texas (which is rather large, might I add) to express my excitement for others blessings. And more times than not, I only drive to visit for like an hour, and then I'm on my way back home. For out-of-staters, I live in Austin. To go to Dallas, you're looking at 3+ hours. To go to Houston, it's pretty much the same. I only mention those two cities because they are where I've traveled to most frequently when celebrating blessings.

Anyways, anyways... why am I the type of girl to step up? Well it's actually quite simple. I do it only for the fact that I want to celebrate with you when Jesus gives you blessings. But this blog post isn't about how committed I am to others. This blog post is about how some pretty special people have been committed to me.

I'm gonna do something I rarely do and I'm gonna name drop (some specifics & some groups). In no particular order, I see ya:
  • Brittany Rutherford
  • Meghann Oldis
  • Tiffany Raines
  • Brittani Winkler
  • Small group friends
  • Sweet family
  • Work friends
Those people are pretty ridiculously awesome.

So, on that note... here's an ode to committed people who couldn't be a bigger blessing to me even if they tried. Friends who care. Friends like me. Friends who step up. Because those friends are such gems.

"Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up." -Ecclesiastes 4:9-10.

Thank you to the above people for your companionship in THE most joyful time of my life. I love that we have each other! Oh and because no blog post is complete without a photo, check this bad boy out. #Besties

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

I Have A Problem

I have a problem... with Blue Bell being back on the market. A girl wants to lose weight, not gain it by eating gallon after gallon of that yummy goodness. I see ya, chocolate chip cookie dough.
I have a problem... with both Miley Cyrus and Kanye West. I dislike them equally. The VMA's didn't help their case either. All aboard the hot mess express.

I have a problem... with there not being enough hours in the day. I mean, I can't even catch up on my DVR'ed shows. Here lately, though, I've made time for Fear The Walking Dead, Bachelor in Paradise and Real Housewives of OC. Give me all the reality shows. 
I have a problem... with the 4th anniversary traditional gift being fruit or flowers. Can you say "boring?" Ross and I have never been the type to get anything big for each other for anniversaries since we spoil each other year round. He can buy me flowers and fruit anytime. I would have liked to see something more creative like the first three years: paper, cotton, or leather.

I have a problem... with people who don't put effort into friendships. Preach.
I have a problem... with how adorable all little girls clothes are. Could I please have thisthis, and this in my life for little baby Kensington? Please, and thank you! I mean... homegirl is starting to wear the same outfit twice. #FirstWorldProblems (oh and I am so totally joking... we are SUPER blessed by everything we have!)

I have a problem... with avocados going bad far too quicly. But then I read on April's blog about freezing them to make them last longer and decided that I need to try this out! Anyone tried it before? I usually keep them in the fridge, but they still go bad before I'm ready to eat them.