Monday, October 12, 2015

I Have No Idea What I'm Talking About

Sometimes I worry that I may say the wrong thing as a Christian woman. I worry that I will be misunderstood, which keeps me from sayings anything at all at times. Two examples:

1) I find that I withhold how I feel about a certain topic because I don't have tons of bible verses memorized to back up how I'm feeling.

2) When I do, in fact, say something, I don't always express the exact right words I'm looking for and then people will critique what I have to say instead of listening to the message. This happened about a year and half ago when I wrote this blog post and said, "God only puts people through what he knows that they can handle. And good gracious, I am one strong woman." First off, I was not implying that I was stronger without God. Rather, my thought process was that I am strong because God chose me specifically (with a purpose in mind) to go through the trial because He knew I would lean on Him. He knew that my strength would be found in Him alone. Second, because God knew I would lean on Him, He "(in my original words) put [me] through what he knows [I] can handle." Again, because He knew I would lean on Him. He designed me, so He ultimately knows me more than anyone else does. At the end of the day, instead of being critiqued by another Christian because of the words I used or will use in the future, maybe others should just acknowledge what the message is, and not what the words are.

All of that being said, I am absolutely not perfect and I have no idea what I'm talking about. God created me in His image and all I'm trying to do is make sense of what He's telling/showing me. 

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I can make my point.

I have read various articles about what a "calling" is. Some articles, made me feel guilty that I claim motherhood as my individual calling (like this one; still a good article even though I disagree with parts), while other articles support individual callings (like this one; I love the quote, "It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for"). Speaking of that quote, I don't think it's a coincidence that right when my daughter was born, my husband got a promotion and I was offered a part-time evening job (to stay home with my daughter). It was all God!
So basically, what I'm saying is that I feel excited knowing that my purpose of existence is to:
1) Share the good news of Jesus Christ so that others may be saved and live eternally with Him in paradise (primary purpose),
2) Share the good news of Jesus' love for us through my story of becoming a mama (secondary purpose).

I don't want to feel bad about believing my calling is motherhood, and (I believe) that you shouldn't feel bad about it either if you believe that's what you were molded for by our Creator. After all, He has always, and will always, get the glory. I am doing what he has called me to do. (Philippians 2:13).

I believe there is something divinely special about everyone's story. This is my story, so that's why I share it so much. Side note, that reminds me: someone also recently told me that my daughter is no more of a miracle than theirs... and I would have to agree completely - every child is a miracle. A sweet sweet gift from God. But, I am not the voice of your (this person's) daughter. I am the voice of my daughter and my story. MY daughter is a miracle and I will believe that for the rest of my life. If you believe yours is also a miracle, then I encourage you to share your story any chance you get, like I do!

I am going to finish this post with what I stated earlier: I am not perfect. I mess up all the time, and will continue messing up. I will be misunderstood by my words. But all I am trying to do is make sense of my story... my experiences... and my life, which God reigns over.


  1. I hate that you feel the need to explain yourself, but you did so gracefully and totally on point! I absolutely love your story and how you have honored God through it, every single step of the way. If that's not testimony, then I don't know what is!! And you're right - you're the voice of your daughter and your story. You're not putting anyone (or their baby) down by shouting from the rooftops that your baby is a miracle. I pray that people are accepting and open to your message and don't stray off in an attempt to find meaning in the words alone. You ARE strong. And you're doing an amazing job. Kensie is so blessed to have such an awesome mama!

  2. I love this!! First off, the Holy Spirit will speak through you so you don't have to worry about what you say or what people will think. He's living in you and takes care of that part for you. :) I think that your story is super encouraging and that you love for Jesus is apparent. I believe He called you to motherhood too and you're an amazing mother, Allison!

  3. You definitely do not have to explain your self. You are spreading the good news of Jesus Christ and that is what is asked of us. Your beautiful baby girl is a miracle :) None of us are perfect, but that's why we rely on Jesus' word to guide us in the direction we need to go. Hugs to you my friend.

  4. It is really great that your calling is motherhood. Do you think someone only has one true calling? I'm not sure so I would love to hear your thoughts. I think my calling is teaching. However, I view my role as a mother to be quite as important as well. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Your relationship with God is a personal one so if he tells you that is your calling, then I believe it. God's timing is always right!

  5. I recently started reading your blog and I love how open and honest you are and do not think your should feel the need to explain yourself or feel like you should hold back. I'm still not sure what my calling is, but I believe God called me to be a mother, so I will be a mother to the best of my ability and do my best to raise my two miracles (yes, they are most definitely miracles of God) to be God fearing men.