Organization and How I Value Time

I refuse to let myself watch the hype that is Marie Kondo. Not because I don't want to - I really do. But I'm saving myself for when I can really commit. I have kind of halfway started decluttering all parts of the house based upon what I've seen on social media: does it spark joy? If not - thank it and get rid of it. See? I paid attention to the cliff notes version.

The main area of focus for my sanity has been Kensington and Bennett's closet. Clothes shopping has always been one of my favorite parts of having a boy and girl. Basically, the kids have never been short on clothes and never will be. K and B share a closet (barely) that happens to be in my sewing/craft room. Eventually, that room will be one of their bedrooms but since they both sleep with us, I won't even worry about that right now.

We recently had an organizing specialist come over (super fancy, I know!) and she really got the ball rolling in this area of focus for me. Here are some pictures but let me tell you: the pictures don't do justice! Compulsively Claire labeled everything in the drawers, separated the clothes by size, removed things too big/too small so that I could sell, and completely restructured how I manage the kids clothes.
before   /   after

Just a look at one drawer in their closet

It's basically my happy place now. My goal is to declutter all over the house as much as possible before the twins arrive in August. I am working in really small spurts because although I'm not technically on a bedrest restriction or anything, my doc still wants me to take it easy (I s'pose that's what happens when you previously give birth to a 25-weeker). So, I do juuuuust a little bit each day and it feels so good.

Time is something that I really cherish. I don't believe that my time is more valuable than another person's but the way that I view it very likely is. For me, I give time to people as a form of a gift (or if I allow an organization expert to come in and do work for me, that's like me getting time back - which is a gift to myself)! The reason I'm bringing this up is because I had an epiphany on Sunday at church. Yadda yadda long story short: the sermon was about "what are you defending?" in relation to that thing sparking anger. Is it a righteous anger or a selfish anger?

It's probably true that my time is more of a comfort and selfish defense that I have. But it has a pure center to it (a righteous defense) - I promise you that. I want to spend my time wisely and give it where I feel it will flourish. One example of me defending time - maybe not so righteously - was while Bennett was in the NICU. I remember getting absolutely, irrationally mad when people would ask me to do things with them. In my mind, I would defensively be like, "what in the heck are you talking about? You think I'd rather spend time with you than my NICU son?" Ross always had to talk me off my emotional ledge and remind me that people just care about me and want to spend time with me. I can laugh about it now and see how everyone just genuinely just wanted a little sliver of me, but in the moment, I would get so worked up. Any other past NICU mom relate? No? Just me?

Well, Sunday's sermon had me revisiting those old feelings and looking more inward, which helped make it clear to me: time is something that I value extremely highly, perhaps more than others, and that is okay! I can now explain things that I could never explain before. For instance, I have never been a "play date" kinda person. I always longed to me that type of mom - I remember pre-planning play dates with mom friends when I was preggo with Kensington. But that's just not who I am. I would rather spend my time alone at the house with the kids, tending to what needs to be done in the home, and let my kids run freely without worry of them breaking anything or hurting themselves. Also staying in PJ's and no makeup is another major perk of not being a play-date-kinda-mom. If you're a play date lover, I applaud you! In another life, I would be more like you!

So yea, time. It's a whole thing for me that I'm finally learning to embrace but also get better at. If I ever seem defensive or possessive about my time, please extend grace. But also know that when you get my time, it's viewed as a gift from me to you with a cherry on top - and that I wouldn't wanna be anywhere else in that moment.

1 comment

  1. I really like how the closet turned out! my boys share a closet and room as well and its hard to keep up with the organizing! and I feel you also I'm not the play date kinda mom! I like being home with my kiddos in our pajamas just spending time me and them.

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